Friday, July 28, 2006
135` & DEAD
I think my
END's coming soon. HAI. Im heartbroken. Listening to what they tell me but not absorbing anything, i cant seem to get what they're saying. They saying about this guy i gave my heart to. And finally their words sunk in. It drop on me like the world drop on me. I cannot believe waht they said, what you said. I didnt noe, i was thinking, then my tears start falling. I still don't get it. Anything they said you said. Have you thought whatever you said can hurt me so badly that i am willing to give my life away? Now, i don't noe what should i do. Should i pick myself up? Should i leave myself like this so i won't hurt that badly they next time something like dis happens?
Why everytime i am happy, i pinked myself up. I start loving you like it won't hurt again. These things happen? They kept from me what you said for a amonth now. And i finally noe that It's all been a very beautiful dream. I didnt want it to end but sumtimes we have to face up to reality. But guess wat? I cant. Been in dreamland too long, i cant live without you. what am i going to do? Im about to lose my sanity. Behind a beautiful smile is a tortured soul. I smile, but it doesnt mean im happy.
why did you say those things to hurt me? DAMN WELL you succeeded. Im shattered ; so broken. Im scared to live. Sometimes, if you're afraid to die, you're afraid to live, what are you gonna do? Every moment im thinking about what they said. It has never left my mind since yesterday. Im thinking is what you say the truth? Do you want me gone?
Sometimes i think about wonderful times, i have the courage to pick myself up. Like i've been doing for many times now. I see your smile. I remember you comfroting me. And i wanna cry. Where were you when i nid you most? Where were you when i wanna cry? But if i nid you to comfort me, what if you're the one who hurt me? Where do i go from there?
IM SHATTERED ; BROKEN, really.
